Wednesday, April 23, 2008

“Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you…”~St. John 15:16.This was the scripture-a-day scripture for September 12, 2006, the day a beautiful baby boy was brought into this world.This scripture expresses my true feelings about adoption. At the wonderful age of 22 I found myself 5 weeks pregnant, single, and not pleased. But I was not troubled by my options. When I was 19, I was in Relief Society when a letter from the First Presidency was read aloud. This letter had a great affect on me and at that moment I made the decision to choose as my Heavenly Father would have me choose. That if I were ever single and pregnant, I would choose eternal life for that spirit that was tabernacled in my body. At that moment my decision was made, so that 3 years later when I would actually be faced with this difficulty (the greatest nightmare of my entire life), I had only to make the proper steps to fulfill His wishes.
From my doctor's office--my poor doctor who had to deliver the "joyous" news of me being 5 weeks pregnant--I went out to my car and called LDSFS and so the journey began. I knew that the solution to my situation was out there, I only had to open my eyes and heart and look. Adoption was my solution. I knew that this little person deserved so many things, the most important of which I could not give him:
An Eternal Family.
My father is not a member of my eternal family and as such I feel the pain of that vacancy in my family and my life. So many people misunderstand this concept and think that if this child were sealed to another family it would exclude him from my family. But we are all sealed to the same Heavenly Parents so as far as I am concerned, it is all the same family.
I started out very uncertain about what this little boy's family should be like, but knowing that he was half black I knew that he should have someone to share his culture with. It was also important to me that he have siblings, people to play with and fight with and allies for the big bad world.
As I read one profile I saw there before me words right out of my own patriarchal blessing. I knew they were his family; they fit all my criteria for him and more. They were real to me. Their pictures contained children eating sand, playing in drawers, the difficulty of matching socks, and a tired mom to top it all off. What more could a girl ask for? Nothing.
I have an inkling of an idea of what I have asked of these amazing people. I really feel like I should be paying child support. I am so grateful. The little boy that I had is the youngest of 5 adopted children with the oldest child being 6 years old. So ladies and gentleman...imagine, 5 car seats! Just think about it. But I am eternally grateful for these angels. I am so blessed. My Father in Heaven trusted me with a very special spirit, and trusted me to find his family.
And I did it!
These wonderful people have given me a life. I go to college. I go on dates. I sleep in until noon on a regular basis. I have received the true blessings of the Atonement. That little boy has been given the greatest life I can imagine, and I have been given the chance to make my own life great. I owe this to my Savior and that wonderful herd of amazing angels.


Lilli said...

I am glad I found your blog! This is very profound and I loved reading your heart and mind in this!

sara said...

Hi - clicked over after reading your comment on mrs. dub's blog - this post you wrote is just beautiful and I'm so happy for you to have found a wonderful family for your baby. I don't have any personal experience with adoption but have read so many stories on people's blogs, and just watched Juno over the weekend - I think adoption is just great!

I hope you have a wonderul week; hope you get better soon!